by Barry Goldman
About thirty years ago my wife and I rented a car in London. The experience is seared into my memory forever. The steering wheel was on the wrong side of the car, and I was expected to drive on the wrong side of the road. It took all my concentration, but I was able to manage, more or less, until we came to a roundabout. I had never seen a roundabout before. Didn’t know what it was.
There was no GPS in those days. We were trying to follow a paper map. And we weren’t on some sleepy country road. There were several lanes involved, and we were moving at a pretty good clip. I didn’t know where I was. I didn’t know where I was going. I didn’t know what I was doing. All my driving instincts were giving me bad information. And people were honking at me. I don’t know how many times we went around that thing before we finally got off.
Over the next few days, I learned to get in the car on the correct side, but it wasn’t easy. I had to consciously override twenty-five years of experience. At first, I automatically went to the usual side. Open the door. No steering wheel. Ah yes, we’re in England. The steering wheel is on the other side. Go to the other side. In the next phase, I was able to remember before I opened the door. I was able to say to myself, “Wait, stop, you’re about to go to the wrong side. You’re in England. They get in on the other side. Go to the other side.”
Then came the moment I want to talk about. I’m walking to the car with the key in my hand. I remember that I’m not supposed to get in on the usual side. I’m supposed to get in on the wrong side. But now I don’t remember which side is the wrong one. Both sides feel wrong. That moment.
I get a similar feeling writing these columns. Sometimes I get to a who/whom decision and they both feel wrong. “Who” feels ignorant and “whom” feels pedantic. Same thing with the subjunctive case. If I were to use the subjunctive, it reads fussy. And if I was not, it sounds illiterate.
Time for one of my favorite jokes. This guy is on the Harvard campus. He stops a tweedy-looking fellow and says, “Excuse me, can you tell me where the library is at?” Tweedy says, “Here at Harvard we don’t end a sentence with a preposition. Would you like to try that again?” The guy says, “Sure. Can you tell me where the library is at, asshole?”
But what I really want to talk about here is politics. And what I want to say is that we seem to be stuck at a moment when all the possible ways forward seem wrong. Read more »