A Warmer View of The Disturbed Paternal Grandparents I Never Knew—The Memoir Continues

by Barbara Fischkin

Brownsville, Brooklyn, New York, 1930’s. “Pushcart Market,” similar to one frequented by the shared paternal grandmother of Barbara Fischkin and her Cousin Bernie.  Source:  Library of Congress. Photographer: Alan Fisher.

Cousin Bernie’s Own Memoir Surfaces Years After His Death

(a.k.a Cousin Bernie, Free-Range Professor-Part Three)

As much as I loved my late Cousin Bernie, I figured that in regard to my own memoir, I was done with him. Cousins are great but those two earlier chapters—on just one cousin—were more than enough.

Then… I heard from Bernie.

A heavenly nudge.

Years after his death, I believed I could identify his voice with its gravelly Brooklyn twang, slightly tempered by a slower drawl acquired during decades in the Midwest.

“There is a lot more to write about me. And if it is about me, then it is also about you.”

I wish I could report that this actually came from the afterlife.

Nope.

It came from the post office.

Joan Hamilton Morris, Cousin Bernie’s widow, mailed his unpublished memoir to me, after she found it while moving to a new assisted living residence. That was about a month ago. I never knew it existed. Now, I had it in hand—Cousin Bernie’s memoir, written quietly in an adult education class he took after retiring as an honored professor of Psychology and Mathematics at a public university in Indianapolis, Indiana.

I flipped through the typewritten, hard copy pages, stopping early at a description of my Grandpa Phillip. He had died before I was born and all I knew about him, from my parents, was that he had been a handsome, drunken, sporadically employed, womanizer who beat his sons and his long-suffering wife, Grandma Toby. Nice. Grandma Toby died young. Grandpa Phillip subsequently romanced a new bevy of women and then, sort of made up for past sins by marrying one of them.

Despite being decades apart in age, Bernie was my first cousin. This explains why we had the same paternal grandparents. Except, unlike me, he had known them. And so, thanks to Cousin Bernie, I read about a different version of Grandpa Phillip. And learned more about Grandma Toby, too. Read more »

Thursday, August 22, 2024

Path and Pathology: Some Philosophic Aspects of Psychotherapy

by Gary Borjesson

I came to psychotherapy from philosophy, first starting therapy in my forties while on sabbatical from St. John’s College. I was struck by its transformative power—so struck that I ultimately resigned my tenure and returned to graduate school to train as a therapist. But I’ve hardly left philosophy behind. Freud reminds me of Nietzsche. Socrates’ fingerprints are all over the motives and methods of psychoanalysis. Donald Winnicott and Erik Erikson bring to mind Hegel, and the list goes on.

Philosophy and psychotherapy (and the humanist tradition in general) see our lives as developmental journeys. In the spirit of Socrates, they view self-exploration and self-awareness as essential to self-actualization. This may seem obvious, but it’s easy to lose sight of. Which makes it remarkable that many academics don’t believe being a “philosopher” need include examining themselves. Yet, how could it not? After all, philosophy means the love of wisdom, and who would say of a true philosopher what Regan said of her father, King Lear, that “he hath ever but slenderly known himself.”

It’s equally remarkable that the Socratic spirit is often absent in therapists, in their own lives and in their work with clients. A variety of forces (not least insurance companies) lead many therapists and clients to focus on techniques and tools for reducing symptoms; this draws attention away from the person as a whole. There is nothing wrong with focusing on symptom-relief, as the advertised “evidence-based” “solution-focused” therapies like CBT do. After all, people vary in what they want and need from therapy, so we should welcome experimentation and a variety of approaches.

That said, if therapy is to encourage deeper self-exploration, it needs to go beyond symptoms to the whole person suffering them. Read more »