Not Even Wrong #12: The Freezer
by Jackson Arn It was my husband’s idea to steal the boxes—he’s the daring half of our compound brain. He spends most of the day drafting letters to committees worldwide, never emails. Education has always been important to him. His parents saw to it that he learned something about everything. Now he sits in bed,…
Not Even Wrong #11: My Small-Town Southern Couple
by Jackson Arn To ease the days’ constipation, I tried exercise. At first I jogged, but jogging was less interesting than the park I was supposed to jog through. I did pushups. These also proved less interesting than I had hoped. Sit-ups were an okay compromise between ignoring my phone and giving it my full…
Not Even Wrong #10: They Hired Me As A Go-Between
by Jackson Arn They hired me as a go-between. The interview was quick. Jazz on the bar. Fake palms. Pantomimed whirls everywhere. The handshake lingered for a week. By then I’d been promoted and had no time for protégés. Smoke hid me from the noise. The billboard stared back. Cars whispered through their hurry. It…
Not Even Wrong # 9: They marched us to a room with yellow walls
by Jackson Arn They marched us to a room with yellow walls and tables painted pink, like our uniforms so we could sit and disappear. We wandered by tiles and corners, carrying the stink of desperation. A chair caught me, because it thought I needed something old to steady me, and it had the canniness…
Not Even Wrong # 8: This could all be circular
by Jackson Arn This could all be circular. Not self-swallowing like the staircase from the poster, I mean circular as in smooth rows of endless smooth stacks perpendicular to pain, touching on a plane but only one, so air bubbles and grains of sand left in the loaf remember their orders and lend a noble…
Not Even Wrong #7: Family Lore
by Jackson Arn When Harold Haber was released from prison, he found out why nobody had visited him in two years. His brother, sister, mother, father, grandmother, uncle, and cousins had died. He and his grandfather were the last two Habers left in the country, maybe the world. His grandfather was 89 years old and…
Not Even Wrong #6: Three Kiddie Poems
by Jackson Arn I: Bubbles Not knowing they’re impossible, they slip through geometry or fitting, go squarish where they must, kissing the rainbow mouths to right-left-up-down from here to death. Bathing in clones, each holds, with skin and neighbors, a secret breath.
Not Even Wrong #5: Some Skeptical Thoughts on Hal Foster’s “Brutal Aesthetics: Dubuffet, Bataille, Jorn, Paolozzi, Oldenburg”
by Jackson Arn Brutal Aesthetics, the second volume of art criticism by Hal Foster to come out this year, begins at the close of World War Two, when the human race was fine-tuning some clever new ways of killing itself. Nuclear war; totalitarianism; genocide on an industrial scale; the gnawing despair of living with all…
Not Even Wrong #4: A Brief History of “The System”
by Jackson Arn Slurs have a way of mellowing into labels. History is full of Yankees and Cockneys, Methodists and Jesuits, Whigs and Tories, who steal a term of abuse and apply it to themselves as an act of sardonic revenge. Sometimes the tactic works too well, and people forget that the word was ever…
Not Even Wrong #3: Reunion
by Jackson Arn You are waiting for me to do something. I can tell because your eyes have the look cheap mirrors get when the edges rust and curl and there is nothing to do but throw them out. You’re powerless, yes, but at least not alone, if that makes it better. In fact your…
Not Even Wrong #2: Random, Run-On Thoughts On Dropping Out
by Jackson Arn It used to be the guilty fantasy of theory bros and voluntary beggars. When turning points expired or wavered they’d hold it to their chests at night, a Molotov they didn’t dare ignite: Could revolution, usually so plodding, be brought about by some proud, precise Nothing? By standing very still and thinking,…
Not Even Wrong #1: What Ever Happened to Chicken Fat?
by Jackson Arn Writing seriously about comedy is a thankless challenge. Only an idiot, or somebody who’s used to thankless challenges because he’s a freelance critic, would bother. The risks are high, the rewards low. Overanalyze your subject and you’ll kill it. Treat it too indulgently and you’re left with a jumble of second-hand bits.…