by Eric Schenck
Ten years ago, I took a one-way flight to Cairo, Egypt. I lived there for three years (and even wrote a book about it).
As a way to celebrate that decision in 2015, here are ten life lessons that living in Egypt taught me. It’s valuable to periodically remind myself of these things. I hope you get some value out of it too.
1) It’s OK to completely change your “life plan”
I majored in Political Science in college, with a minor in Arabic. The plan was to become a diplomat working in the Middle East. Within a year of moving to Cairo (and meeting diplomats living my “dream life”), that plan was shattered.
They all seemed to be depressed. They got stationed in a new country every few years, and had kids with no real friends. Their work life was also a far cry from the spy movies I had eaten up. Diplomats spent their days surrounded by stacks of paperwork. Hardly my idea of a good time.
Now? I work in marketing and help companies make more money with email. If 22 year old Eric could see himself now, I don’t know how he’d feel. Probably confused. Maybe even a bit disappointed.
But things change. You change, and as soon as goals you set in the past stop serving you, throw them in the trash. Easier said than done, but it’s something I continue to learn.
2) Everybody should learn another language in their life
The best thing I’ve done in the last ten years is learn a few languages. First it was Modern Standard Arabic in college. Then I switched to the Egyptian dialect. After that I learned German, and am currently dabbling in Spanish.
Languages open up a whole new world for you. You find music you never knew existed, and discover a whole new way of thinking. Most importantly, languages allow you to connect with other people like nothing else. This is incredible when it happens.
Chatting with Egyptian doormen? With old grannies on the bus? With taxi drivers on my way to work? It showed me a side of Egypt that only their language could give me, and I’m still thankful for it.
3) You build stronger connections with people sharing difficulties than you do sharing successes
I moved to Egypt in 2015. It was only a few years after the revolution, and the country was suffering from heavy inflation. Ten years later, it still is.
One day at my job I noticed my Egyptian colleagues all sitting together at a table. They were eating lunch and squealing with laughter. I didn’t understand every word, but enough to know that they were talking about the economy.
Later I asked my coworker why they seemed so happy if things were so objectively difficult. He stopped and thought for a minute, then nodded his head.
“Because we all have the same problem.”
It’s a simple thing to realize. But it’s true. We all go through shitty times, and life will always have a curveball right around the corner. But the best way to use it? Connect with your fellow humans.
4) We are the same in general, but we are different in the specific details
Egyptians (on average) want what’s best for their family. They want to be healthy. They want to be happy. Egyptians (on average) also pray five times a day, are more homophobic than Americans, and take their religion seriously.
I wish I could tell you that everybody around the world was just like you. But they’re not. People have different convictions. Different values. Different traditions passed down through the generations. Different things that offend them, and a completely different way of being delighted.
We always hear that “we’re all the same.” That’s true, but it’s only half of the story. The specific details are important.
Which one of these you choose to focus on shapes your worldview.
5) Money doesn’t buy happiness, but it certainly buys stress relief
The most I ever made in Cairo was about 500 dollars a month in Cairo. That averaged out to around three dollars an hour. Most Americans would laugh at that.
But I couldn’t have been happier. I was meeting people all the time. Tinder was free, and beer with my friends was cheap. What more could I want?
The thing is, I knew that this wasn’t going to be my life forever. As a 22-year-old my expenses were next to nothing. Regardless, I knew I wasn’t going to be stuck there for long. As soon as I left Egypt my pay would skyrocket.
That has happened as expected, and it’s brought with it a realization: stack some money aside, and the stress you feel starts to dwindle. As happy as I was in Egypt, I was always thinking about money. How to budget it. How to make more of it. But now? It’s still a thought, but hardly the dread it used to be. Most Egyptians never had that opportunity.
The pursuit of money (and getting it) isn’t going to make you a happier person. But it is going to take a lot of stress away. And that’s probably worth it in itself.
6) The person that wins at life is the person that spends the most time with the people they like
Hard work is great. Creating stuff and building a life that you’re proud of is incredible. But what’s it all for? For most of us, our end goal is usually pretty simple:
Spend time with the people that we like.
I learned this being so far away from my family in Egypt. I also learned it from making friends. The best times I ever have (and the moments that feel the most fulfilling) are almost always with other people.
But you don’t have to be rich to do it. So try to stay connected to the people you love. We all end up at the same point anyway, so might as well start now.
7) The moments directly preceded by fear or anxiety are the moments your future self will be proud of
Most of life is pretty average. Even for people that have very non-average lives. You wake up. You eat stuff. You do stuff. You go back to sleep, and then you do it all again the next day.
But every now and then, life gives you an opportunity to do something pretty cool. Your sign that it might be worth doing? The fear before you do it.
Not saying you should jump on every opportunity to do something crazy. And of course use your brain. But “I’m scared to do this, therefore I should probably do it” has usually led me to something wonderful. Use that as you will.
8) Privilege is a real thing
I used to shake my head at the concept of white privilege. I work hard for what I have – how on earth could I be privileged?
But then I moved to Cairo. And as any Egyptian will tell you, traveling with their passport is difficult. There are only a few countries they can freely go to. But me? I’m American, can go just about anywhere, and most of the time just pick up a visa stamp on arrival.
When people say “travel while you’re young”, what they really mean is “Western people that have no responsibilities should travel if they have a little bit of money saved up.” Most of the world doesn’t fit that description. They probably wish they did, but they don’t.
Privilege pops up everywhere. The reason it’s not obvious is that you can’t see it (and if you can’t see it, it’s probably because you’re the one benefiting from it). A lot of people don’t have, and never will have, the same opportunity as you. Always remember this.
9) Not taking things too seriously is a superpower
I was tightly wound when I first moved to Egypt. I had my plan to be a diplomat. I took the language seriously. But then Egyptians started to peck away at me. And thank God they did.
Delays, broken promises, traffic, and the ever-confusing mystery of the Arabic phrase Inshallah taught me to take a breath.
Keep your word, sure. But also just try to chill out. And make that a lifestyle as much as you can. And if you are going to take things seriously, try to limit yourself to just two or three.
We’re all going to die. Life is too short to have a stick up your ass.
10) If you want to take an adventure, one is usually right around the corner
Getting on that plane to Cairo was probably the most adventurous thing I’ve ever done. But even while living in Egypt, it felt like I did something new quite a bit. Train rides to Alexandria. Skinny sipping in Aswan. Getting lost just about everywhere. And it kept me engaged and excited about life.
It’s easy to get in a rut. We establish our routines, work on our goals, and then ask ourselves where the past year went.
I think “mini adventures” are the solution. Keep working on your things, sure, but do something weird every now and then. Something a bit uncomfortable. A quick one night camping trip somewhere. A swim in a lake you’ve never been to. Life moves a bit slow (and becomes richer) when you plan these mini adventures in it.
A few years in Egypt taught me a lot, and ten years later, I’m trying to keep the spirit of adventure alive. And I hope you do too!
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