[Enter LEBOWSKI, on a cart. Exit BRANDT]
LEBOWSKI
Marry, sir!—You be Lebowski, I be Lebowski, ‘tis a wondrous strange comedy of errors. But I am a man of business, as I imagine you are; tell me what you’d have me do for you.
THE KNAVE
Sir, I possess a rug, that, i’faith, tied the room together—
LEBOWSKI
You sent Brandt a messenger on horseback; he inform’d me. Where is my fitting?
THE KNAVE
They sought thee, these two gentlemen—
LEBOWSKI
I shall repeat; you sent Brandt a messenger on horseback; he inform’d me. Where is my fitting?
THE KNAVE
Then thou art aware ‘twas thy rug, sir, that was the target of this crime.
LEBOWSKI
Was it I, sir, who urinated on your rug?
[H/t: Darcy James Argue]