Akim Reinhardt at The Public Professor:
Some people host Thanksgiving, drawing loved ones to their home. Others eschew traveling to family affairs, and instead congregate with friend at local, low stress gatherings. But most are among the millions who plod near and far to spend it with their ragged clan. For them, I offer some tips on how to make the most of it and avoid the worst of it.
1. Stand near the deviled egg plate. Like most every other human on the planet, you love them more than you care to admit. If you try to play it cool, they’ll be gone before you know it. And then you’ll cry. Don’t cry on Thanksgiving because you missed out on the deviled eggs. Just scarf them up til your heart’s content. Or until its cholesterol level maxes out.
2. Put in some early face time with other people’s kids. Enjoy those rug rats while you’ve still got the energy. That way later on, when you’re porked out, half-drunk, and exhausted, you can tell ‘em to piss off in good conscience.
3. Watch some football. If you like watching football, this is a given. But if you don’t like watching football? Well, if you don’t like talking to Aunt Mathilda either, this is an easy way out when there’s nowhere else to turn.