How to pick up women (with science)

Dean Burnett in The Guardian:

It's a sad fact, but women lack free will. Although they appear as complex and individual as any male (often much more so), it seems women are slaves to inherent biological “programming” which means they will be physically intimate with any man who employs a specific set of behaviours and phrases. This claim may seem far-fetched, but it is a widely held belief. A Google search for “how to pick up women” produces725m results. In contrast, a Google search for “funny cats” produces179m results. Remember, this is the internet.

But the thing about these guides to picking up women is that, despite the vast number of them and the dedicated researchers, known as pickup artists, looking into them, very few utilise legitimate science. That's where I come in.

Men are always saying to me “Dean, you're married; how the hell did that happen?”, but I can read between the lines and see what they really mean. I understand; it can't be easy asking for relationship advice from someone as successful, handsome and self-aware as I am.

I've never been part of the dating game and have never attempted to chat up an unfamiliar woman, but being a straight white male with a media platform means I'm allowed to speak with authority about groups and communities I have no involvement with. So, based on established scientific principles, here are a few techniques (or “moves”) that men can use that are almost certain to effectively woo any woman.

More here.